glimpses
by yukineIGH
Summary: SOKAI;- alphabet ficlet  i think . First is Sora's, mostly post-KH2.


Yay, update! Inspired by reading too many of these. I've had plenty of random ideas but never really got the put-them-in-a-story stage so now they're these little... things. Most are probably overdone and cliched but I don't care I had FUN writing this. I may do another chapter, 'hers', as in from Kairi's 3rd person POV (as this is Sora's). God, I've missed these guys. Too much Vanitas recently.

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his

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_**a**_**live**: He can feel the slide of air in his lungs, the frantic thump of his heart and the pounding of blood beneath his skin. He swings his weapon at the enemy and his panting breath hangs like a cloud before him, visible proof that, despite all the odds, he is still alive.

_**b**_**elieve**: When he laughs again, leaning back with his hands behind his head, Riku finally loses it.  
"I can't believe you, Sora."  
"What?"  
"Stop pretending like none of it happened, like I didn't do the things I did, because I did. I _did_."

_**c**_**old**: He's understandable confused when Kairi whispers that she's cold. They do live an island, after all, and the night is warm like it always is. But he decides he'd rather play along because he'd never pass up a chance to hold her close him.

_**d**_**ecide**: He so wants to ask Riku exactly why he decided that Maleficent was more trusting than his own childhood friend, but he knows he never will. He's too afraid to hear the answer.

_**e**_**ager**: He knows that when it came to battle he'd always rushed right in, no second thoughts, no hesitance, seemingly eager for the fight to his friends.  
The truth? He just wanted to get it over with. So yeah, he was eager. But not in the way they thought.  
Another fight won was a step closer to Kairi.

_**f**_**ly**: It's a wonderful feeling to know that she's going to fly with him, that they can share this night sky for a while. He tells her to keep a tight hold on her happy thought, and she nods, but five seconds later she's still clinging to him.  
"… You can let go of me now."  
She looks up at him, and there's clear confusion in her eyes. "But you just said to hold on."

_**g**_**one**: He almost broke down when he discovered that his home was gone. But it wouldn't have been tears for the islands – it was for the thought of how much everything would change. It was for the life that had been ripped away from him, the duty and responsibility that had been shoved at him in the form of a giant key. It was for his fear.  
But he'll never tell anyone. He has to be strong.

_**h**_**ug**: Parting from his friends and making his way back home two years after last leaving, his head is spinning. He only hopes that once they'd got past the bewilderment of having been apart for so long with only a strange explanation that involved weaponised keys, talking animals and a door to light to explain his absence, his mother would be willing to deliver the hug he'd been waiting to collapse into.

_**i**_**dentity**: He had trouble with his identity, sometimes. The line between Sora and Roxas would blur every now and then, and he hated when something would happen and he'd have to pause to remember who he is right then, pause to push Roxas' persona back because he didn't want to be anyone but himself.  
"I don't care what you say, you're not me. You're not Sora."

_**j**_**ump**: He'd never seen anyone jump so much in his life than when Riku had snuck up behind Kairi when they were still kids and yelled 'Gotcha!' He would have laughed, except that it made Kairi scream with terror and then cry. So he chased Riku off instead and threw sand in his general direction, but should probably have thought more about that as the wind was blowing in his face.  
"That was so stupid, Sora," a giggling Kairi said, as he spluttered and spat the sand back out.  
"Yeah, but at least it made you smile."

_**k**_**iss**: He knows Kairi's waiting for the kiss he's too scared to give. He wants it to be special for her, romantic – he just needs to think of the right way to go about it, make a plan… and then have the guts to go through with it. But even as he thinks this, feeling her expectant gaze on him, he doesn't notice Riku come up behind him and shove him forward so that his mouth crashes against hers.

_**l**_**ight**: Her touch is a feather on his skin and he finds himself leaning into it despite the fact that her light burns, as he becomes less and less himself and more and more of something else.

_**m**_**agic**: He can tell she's struggling to learn how to use magic. Sparks where there should be flames, raindrops where there should be a torrent, a small shock where there should be a blast of electricity. But one thing she knows how to use is Cure, because she needs to so often as he and Riku tend to get a bit too enthusiastic using the Keyblades in their sparring sessions.  
"Seriously, guys, it's like you _want _to chop each other to pieces."

_**n**_**ightmare**: He struggles to sleep now, and it's so hard when the darkness could hide anything but the light still casts shadows. The nightmares don't leave when Kairi sleeps over, but when he wakes gasping for breath and choking on his terror it's easier to handle with her there to silently take his shaking body in her arms and whisper that it's okay, even though it isn't.

_**o**_**ath**: He made an oath, a promise to get back to her, and nothing was going to make him break it. They could throw everything they had at him but he'd get through it, he would get through it all. Even when he stands alone, surrounded by at least a thousand enemies. Even when he's faced with member after member of that stupidly disorganised Organisation, he won't back down. He won't let himself feel the fear fluttering at the back of his heart, because he has to believe he'll live through it for her. For Kairi.

_**p**_**uddle**: It doesn't rain often on the islands, and when it does it's a bit of a novelty for most of the islanders as they flock outside to make the most of it. Personally, he's not too keen on the stickiness of warm water in the heat, but he can't say he doesn't enjoy splashing in the puddles with his friends, or her joy when he joins in… he can always bathe later, anyway.

_**q**_**uartet**: There isn't just the two of them, he knows. They're a four, a quartet. When he looks at Kairi sometimes he sees Naminé in her eyes although he's not sure how, and he can feel Roxas, sometimes, a murmur in his mind or a fleeting heartbeat that isn't in synch with his own. But Roxas doesn't have a heart, does he?  
"I can feel her so much when I'm with you, and it scares me, Sora. Sometimes I don't know who I am…"  
"I know. I know."

_**s**_**tar**: When he looks at the stars now he doesn't see points of light in a dark sky, he sees worlds, places he must protect, so now he's not quite so fond of stargazing anymore. But when Kairi spots his constellation (because Riku hates the sight now, too) and points it out to them both, he looks again and for a moment he's marvelling at lights in the sky and other worlds are forgotten. But only for a moment.

_**t**_**ainted**: He can't help but worry when the King invites them to Disney Castle. Kairi is supposed to be a Princess, but she doesn't act like one, tainted as she was by his and Riku's influence. They'd expect proper behaviour, surely, and when she burps openly during the evening meal Queen Minnie does look shocked. He's relieved when the King, however, just laughs it off.  
"Excuse _you_, Kairi."

_**u**_**nworthy**: And there it is. Princess. She's a _Princess_. And he so doesn't deserve her, he thinks, and he tells Kairi this. He's unworthy of her, a Princess of Heart. He's just a boy with a weapon, nothing special, and it surprises him when her eyes widen and she gets angry. She tells him that he's wrong, no, really. That he's crazy. She tells him that he's saved her everyday, that he's protected her and defended her, never failing to put her first. She says that after all he's done for her she should be the one to feel unworthy of him, and shushes his protests.  
"If anything, then, neither of us are unworthy," Kairi whispers. "We saved each other, remember?"

_**v**_**acation**: Summer vacations are the best, he thinks. Long, hot, lazy days on their little island, doing absolutely nothing at all. Kairi says so herself; he's a lazy bum. He just reminds her that she'd admitted she was, too, so she wasn't one to talk.

_**w**_**ish**: Kairi looks at him one day and tells him he has an eyelash on his cheek, before reaching out for it herself. Putting it on the tip of her finger, she tells him to make a wish, but he just looks at her and silently wonders what the point would be in wishing for something that's already there.

_**x**_**enophobia**: He'd never suffered from xenophobia, being the happy, optimistic guy that he is. But when that stranger in the brown cloak had turned up in the Secret Place like that, he hadn't been able to help the spark of terror he'd felt. Even then he'd recognised the aura of darkness the man had was something to be wary of and keep away from.

_**y**_**earning**: He hates it when Kairi cries. He asks her sometimes why she lets those ugly tears fall down her pretty face, and sometimes that's enough to make her smile. But this time she doesn't, she just looks at him and there's so much sadness and fear and yearning in her eyes that he suddenly understands what he has to do this time.

**_z_eal**: Zeal is something he has plenty of, especially when it comes to impressing Kairi. It was like that for a long time, competing with Riku for her attention. He could remember, though, that one time when they were thirteen. He lost, again, and knew with sudden clarity that compared with Riku she wouldn't look at him twice. Why would she? Riku was everything she could ever want, and he was nothing. But then, as he sat there in defeat, he was shocked to see Kairi bypass Riku and come to him. She asked if he was okay, concern in her eyes, and as he nodded slowly with puzzlement all over his face she giggled at him before leaning forwards to touch her lips to his cheek. He can vaguely remember that Riku protested, but not the words, as his brain had been temporarily melted with the hot flush on his skin.  
Looking back, Sora realises it wasn't anything to do with being best.  
You just have to be yourself.


End file.
